Summer 2006
My first tattoo! Love it, and very happy with the entire process of getting it. It is on my upper left arm.
The buckle/arm with dagger out of crown is the clan McQuarrie crest badge. The words mean The Red Tartaned Army, which is the McQuarrie Battle Cry. I have always wanted that as a tattoo, but felt it needed something else, hence the thistle. Thistle is symbolic of Scotland, so it goes well with the badge.
The artwork is awesome, and was custom designed by Jacqueline at Yonge Street Tattoos in Toronto. I had pictures of the badge and the thistle, and had the idea of the thistle being on both sides of the badge--she did the rest. I especially like how she did the flower of the thistle solely as shading, using some white ink to give it that wispy quality. She does absolutely fabulous work (she has also done two tattoos for my wife), and I highly recommend her (and the shop) to anyone.
The details: It took about 4.5 hours to complete, 2.5 hours on outline and the rest on shading. It does hurt to get a tattoo, but not too bad. It felt like getting scratched hard over and over again. By the time the shading was almost done, I was ready for it to be over--the shading was the hardest part to get through! And make sure you are hydrated and have eaten before you go--I had prepared, but even so I almost passed out near the end. Had to take a break and drink some orange juice, which did the trick. I felt better pretty quickly and did not feel sick after. Cost: $528 CDN. The cost is one of the reasons I waited so long to get my tattoo. Now that I have tenure, I can afford it!
Fall 2005
..a good cigar is like a fine wine is like a smokey Scotch is like a great breakfast beer is like a good cigar is like a...
(Did he just say breakfast beer?)
(Yes, I did, and if you have a problem with that I suggest you take it up with Ed!)
The Truth, The Whole Truth and Nothin' But The Truth is that Ian Hunter still rocks.
Ad campaign:
``This ad has been removed by order of a Truth in Advertising Law directive. The Truth Shall Not Be Told.''
I didn't know Laws could give directives. Neat how that works.
The world seems a bit more strawberry jammy when I hear from old friends. Thanks, all.
I just don't have the time to blog. Instead you get this crap.
Summer 2004
My favourite word today is table. "Let's table this item."
Great Big Sea is a heck of a fun band. I was heavily into them in the mid 90's, and then kinda lost interest--until I listened to Turn again. What a great album! Even without an Old Black Rum, it rocks. Turn may not be the greatest song ever created, but it still is quite beautiful.
Jon Stewart is the greatest political pundit since...well, somebody. I don't know my political pundit history as well as I should.
Favourite saying: "You're as funny as borscht."
Embrace the morning after. There might not be another. But don't hug it too tight, or you might just squeeze the life out of it. That wouldn't be very tao, now would it.
"The liberal media". I think I finally figured out what is going on with this phrase. Entertainment shows are liberal, in that they will show things that are typically associated with a liberal agenda. Sex, gay lifestyles, abortion, and other things. Sure, I get that. Nip Tuck is not a conservative show. But somehow this apparent liberal bias in entertainment shows gets translated to mean that news journalism has a liberal bias. That I don't get at all. I don't see a liberal bias in the mainstream media (frankly, I don't see much of anything in the mainstream media--except for incessant coverage of Martha Stewart).
When laying laminate floor, be prepared to spend a lot of time getting the first few boards down. Don't get discouraged, once you find a rhythm it will go faster.
Ad campaign:
(Sound: TYPEWRITER frantically being typed--not a computer, a typewriter. Visual: black screen)
"Please remain calm. Production of light bulbs has been increased, and a shortage this winter is unlikely. But why take the risk? Stock up NOW!!"
(Sound: carriage return bell; then silence.)
Some days I feel like a strawberry man in a grape jam world.
Fall 2003
Chilliwack's My Girl is one of the greatest songs ever created. It is a vocal masterpiece, and I would love to see someone on American Idol massacre it. The greatest ten minutes of life are when the radio station plays My Girl followed by Every Little Thing She Does is Magic. After that, turn it off--your listening day won't get any better. mmmm .... gone gone gone she been gone so long, wonder if I'm ever going to see my girl ....
Saying 'In Steven Spielberg's Minority Report' and then describing the plot of Minority Report is an error. The error lies in the fact that although Steven helped create the movie, the plot was created by Philip K. Dick, and I think he deserves credit for that. You may now resume your scheduled programming...
My current heroes are David Suzuki and Bruce Cockburn. David Suzuki just because, and Bruce Cockburn since anyone who can write the lyric ``The trouble with normal is it always gets worse'' amazes me. What great words, in a great order.
Ad campaign: ''Making the world a better place...one burger at a time.''
Rowan Atkinson is a terrific actor. ''BALDRICK!!''
My favourite word is Nairn. I don't know what it means. It sounds like a fast car zooming by. Any word that contains the doppler effect is wonderful by nature. But not by nurture. But who am I to comment on Nairn's upbringing?
Sometimes the best thing you can say is ``Help me understand what you're feeling.''
CFL football is far superior to NFL football. There, I've said it. GO Blue!
Ad campaign: ''Some people think our trucks are made of steel, but they are really made of...courage.'' (cue guitar player) (sadly, this ad is almost a reality these days.)
There once was a woman who lived in a shoe. No, really.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is nothing.
Fall 2002
Facial hair is most happy when it is blowing in the wind.
Sometimes a watch really is necessary. But make sure when you do strap one on that you actually need to know the time that day. On reflection, you may find that you don't. Cherish those days.
Philip K. Dick books seem to make horrible movies, with few exceptions. I bet Phil would be proud (and he would own a Lexus, and talk on a Nokia phone).
Fresh cut flowers can sometimes brighten an otherwise dreary room.
A corner affords the walker many possibilities. Make all turns and you will get nowhere, but experience the nowhere completely. Make one turns and you will go far, but the journey back will elicit deja vu. My advice to the walker: put down considerable distance between turns, and make at least three turns on every journey.
The economy is not the stock market, even if the evening news leaves you with that impression. Remember: the evening news is not there to serve and inform you; it is there to increase the wealth of its owners.
Smells elicit powerful memories--so be careful what you smell.
Elections should be publicly funded. The government is supposed to represent the people, and so the people should pay for the process to choose their government. Anything less and the government will be serving the wrong master.
I fail to see how the media is dominated by "liberal" commentary. If the media was truly liberal, I wouldn't spend so much time yelling at television sets.
Separation of church and state is a good thing. The phrase "under God" wasn't always in the pledge of allegiance. Was the pledge crappy before that was added?
Always be wary of attempts to indoctrinate the young, especially under the guise of patriotism. Anything that short circuits the process of critical thinking should be placed on the curb for pickup every Monday and Thursday.
Fall 2001
Neumann is Neumann.
MnSCU should more properly be called MnSCUEUM. University of Minnesota is a state university of Minnesota. MnSCUEUM=Minnesota State Colleges and Universities Except University of Minnesota.
Drama is not "waking up in the morning".
Relationships are dynamic; this is not a flaw in human nature, it is a strength. You should keep that in mind as your life progresses.
Relationships may also be chaotic; this would be a flaw in human nature, in my opinion. I think a study of the chaoticity of interpersonal relationships is long overdue. Question: Does every person have their own Lyapunov constant, or do we as a species have a Lyapunov constant? I hypothesize the former.
Reality based TV is misnamed. I tend to yell at television sets (even when they are off). It gives me pleasure.
I like the names Gigolo, Digger, Banana, and Random Access for cats.
Clothing should always be worn for fun, not profit.
I am agnostic with respect to religion, and agnostic with respect to orbiting teapots.
Never pass up an opportunity to walk in the rain.
Shouldn't the economy serve humanity instead of humanity serving the economy? Why is it required that a company's profits increase each quarter? Why are the people who already have money able to invest that money and make more money without actually doing anything? This seems screwed up to me. Excuse me, I have to go find a TV to yell at.
Fall 2000
My middle name is Robert. Let's just get that out of the way immediately, so there will be no recriminations later. I would hate for you to think I was shielding you from the truth.
Favourite fish: the one I'm currently eating
Favourite books: A Scanner Darkly by Philip K. Dick, Sandman by Neil Gaiman
I believe milk and cheese should be stored far away from each other in the fridge. There is no need to tempt a dog patch romance. I find the cheese is quite happy near the onion, and the milk prospers by jam. Sprite should be consumed as quickly as possible, or it will turn your refrigerator against you. Trust me on this one.
Favourite song: Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic by The Police
Least favourite, unliked fish: the one I'm currently eating
I prefer cats to dogs, and Steely Dan to Ricky Martin. But the preferences are not the same; I could learn to love a dog.
Least favourite anything: pop culture, coercion
I like to read, write, and draw. Sometimes I do these things well, sometimes not. It doesn't stop me from doing them.
Best Burger in The World: A Canada 103 Burger from Red Boot in Winnipeg (but you have to get Karvey's and chili as well)
Best part of life: people and traditions (not the hurting kind)
The longest I have ever gone without shaving has been five months, but that was under special circumstances. The circumstances were that I didn't feel like shaving for five months.
Favourite joke: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.
Favourite word: grooving
Favourite word in a sentence: "I was grooving to the possibilities the situation was affording."